May 25, 2011

Guns and Vibrators

We’re not moving; in fact I have lived in this house longer than I have lived anywhere since my childhood home. Awhh, that is so warm and fuzzy, kind of like the stuff in the corners, fuzzy.

When I was a kid mom made us do spring cleaning. Move the furniture clean behind it, clean the furniture, and wash the walls, windows and light fixtures. Thank goodness it was only once a year.

Upon adulthood however, I would just move once a year.

But we have been in our home for six and a half years and while it’s not like I have never done a spring cleaning, it just wasn’t quite as thorough as Mom would like. (Believe me I hear about it when she comes for her winter visits.)

So this past week when I rearranged our bedroom, I found some pretty interesting stuff under the bed. Frankly I was amazed at the stuff under there.

Home is where the hair ball is. And this particular hair ball had been formulating so long it was representative of at least three different hair colors: Standard red, kitchen beautician blonde and LA Espresso.

There was also a commemorative bat from the 1975 Cincinnati Reds, one sock, one panty ho, a heating pad that does not heat, hot curlers that get too hot and two items I’d rather not mention.

God help me, I’m scared to move the couch.

No comments: