August 13, 2008

Roach Bait and Weed Killer

Last year for my birthday the neighbors gave us some “wine”, along with a powdered mix that you add to the “wine”, and blend with ice for “merlot” “slushees”. Hey at least they made an effort, misguided as it was, to give us wine and not just wine stuff.

We stuck it in the wine fridge and forgot about it. Well, we were so out of wine that the other night I opened it. In a former life I have drank: Mad Dog 20/20, Manischewitz, Boonesfarm, Bartles & James (all varieties) and some homemade stuff my older sister’s friend stole from her grandfather’s basement. But even I could not drink this.

It was so bad I couldn’t pour it down the sink because we have a septic tank and I was afraid of what it would do to the little turd eaters that live there. Don’t want to kill the excrement devouring microbes that keep the front lawn from becoming a really big loo. And I did not want to pour it in the yard and kill the grass I have been trying all summer to save.

What to do? Once before when we had some really bad wine, the kind from a big glass jug, Wayne’s dad told me if I put it in saucers on the floor the silverfish and palmettos, that invaded the apartment we were living in, would crawl in and drown. It didn’t work and I ended up polishing off the jug, (don’t tell Wayne, but I couldn’t help it he was out of town, and I was lonesome.) But this “wine” was worse than that, and since we are bug free, knock wood and thank you God, I poured it in the cracks of the driveway to kill the wayward weeds trying to grow there.

So, I won’t say if it kills weeds, bugs, or septic systems don’t drink it, because the exceptions to that rule would be too numerous to list.

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