November 29, 2010

Doctor Doctor

Hhm? Maybe I could work in a Doctor’s office. I have a certain skill set that would coalesce perfectly with the usual waiting room experience.

Disclaimer: There are Doctors that deserve dump trucks full of money off-loaded into their yards. However, these are usually Doctors who aren’t in it for the money. These are Doctors who cure diseases, aid the suffering, travel to less fortunate countries and save babies… This is not about those Doctors.

In fact, this isn’t really about the Doctor at all; it’s about the office management if you will, and how I could fit right in.

1. Tardiness, I am good at that. Have you ever gotten in to see your Doctor at the scheduled appointment time? I didn’t think so. But if I were working the reception desk I would offer such original, believable, heart wrenching excuses for the Doctor’s lateness that you would end up feeling bad for taking up the time of said exalted saintly Doctor with your inconsequential wart, pink eye, inflamed ‘roid… whatever.

2. Seemingly pointless repeated trips to the reception desk to fill out redundant paperwork, including the one that says we can cancel your appointment, but you can’t without suffering the wrath of Khan. This comes under the heading of killing time. The office staff is actually killing your time to keep your mind off your actual appointment time. I have worked for at least six call centers; I can kill some time.

3. Minor annoyances. Pens that won’t write, old magazines, sticky chairs, no remote for the TV that is stuck on a infomercial channel, empty water cooler, full water cooler but no cups, and brain bending Muzak are minor annoyances unless you are sick and have been sitting on a plastic chair for an hour, but they are crucial to the morale of the staff who take out their petty grievances with the boss by letting the white coat free area go unattended. I have always enjoyed finding little ways to stick it to the man.

There you have it, three solid reasons why my next job should be at a Doctor’s office.

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