June 23, 2008

Crushin on My Captain

Saturday afternoon it was Captain Kirk and Saturday evening it was Captain & Tennille. I got Wayne to go out for a little Karaoke; I wonder if he regrets telling me he would give me everything I want? Probably not, that’s why I love him like a muskrat. Love will keep us together but maybe not Karaoke, however, he is a good sport and even sang two songs; he’s really pretty good, I wonder if he secretly likes to sing?

My first at bat, I hit a home run and got a fan. He was pretty old and said he had left his hearing aid at home, but I trust in his assessment of my Karaoke prowess, even if the old fart did grab my ass. Then Wayne sang and he was a hit too; so I grabbed his ass. By the time my next turned rolled around I had about 28 beers, the sound system misfired, so I had to stand there on stage for 2 agonizing minutes while it got fixed and restart my song twice. I bombed! Gawd, how quickly a drunken crowd forgets your past glory.

Wayne sang again, did great, got some applause but the crown was thinning and yawning. Beer, singing and the Florida heat can wear you out. I was determined to go out on a high note though. I was once told I have a soprano inside me I just have to let her out. NEVER believe anyone who is trying to sell you something; especially singing lessons. NEVER try to hit a note out of your range just because you’re drunk enough to think you can. And NEVER sing Broadway in a country bar. Uh Baby, can we go home now?

So the evening ended with me begging Wayne to do that to me one more time. And, once again living up to his promise to give me everything I wanted, he did! My Captain sang me one more love song on the home karaoke machine he bought me before tucking me in with 2 aspirin and a bottle of water.

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