Rachel Lucas wrote recently about her ideas of what being a real man is and how women should be held to the same standards. Here is a small piece, but please real her whole entry to really get the feel for what she thinks on this matter. We Need a Real Woman Manifest.
So there’s really not a lot of mystery about what everyone agrees a “real” man is. We all know “real” men are:
Mentally, emotionally, and intellectually strong, even if not physically (crippled and elderly men can still be “real” men). Hardworking, honorable, honest, dutiful, protective of family and country. Brave, courageous, rational, reasonable, kindhearted, and respectful. Knowledgeable about how to survive in rough times and how to solve problems. And so on.
What I started wanting to know when I was about 16 was just how in the hell any of those things were (or should be) exclusive to men. I realized even then that in fact, they are not. All adults should have every one of those personality and character traits as a matter of course.
So then I started wondering why anyone bothered with the phrase “real man” at all. Don’t they just mean “real adult”? As a young girl, shouldn’t I strive to be exactly the kind of person I kept hearing a “real man” would be? I thought so, and I still do. Maybe that’s why you never hear me whining about how my butt looks in these jeans or crying that no one pays enough attention to me. Who gives a crap? I don’t need any reassurances about silly shit because apparently, I am a “real man”, secure in my own “manliness”. Even though I’m a woman
Rachel’s post prompted me to write a little of what I think on the subject.
I have always been proud of my big boned, size 10 feet, sturdy stature. I have felt superior to little whiney cows that have to ask for help to carry milk in from the car. If I want to move the refrigerator to sweep behind it, I move the refrigerator. And, I have always felt superior to nauseating catty bitches that treat men and other women like shit. They think they have the golden p---y and give us real women a bad name. I think women should behave within the real man/woman code but not confuse that with acting like some of the worst traits of some men. I think girls mistake being a real woman with acting like what they think real men do.
Case in point: The rise of the male stripper shows for women. Pardon me this is gross! Why do I want to give some oily ego maniac $1 to feel me up after he has made his way around the room feeling up a gaggle of nasty women who think that this behavior makes them progressive and liberated. I don’t believe it is in the basic female make-up to randomly bed the fantasy type male, so why pay money to have some man with less body hair than me, pretend he would.
2nd case in point: I think girls mistake being promiscuous with being equal to men. Again I think men are programmed different; to spread their seed to all. Women aren’t. So why is different not equal? Why do some women think that acting like a man is what it takes to be equal to a man? We are supposed to be different, that doesn’t make one better than the other, it makes things work.
3rd case point: Girls brawling, WTF? Do they think this makes them more of a woman? In fact it makes them more in common with the lowest dominator of men.
4th case in point: Making out with other girls just to impress boys, (if it’s because you like it, get a room, who cares) and flashing and no underwear. Do you really expect to be taken seriously if the only way you can get or hold someone’s attention is to flash the beave?
So, I do think women should have a real woman code that is like the real man code, but don’t mistake it for thinking you have to act like a man, especially those men who aren’t following the code.